Support if your child is refusing to go to school
Understand why your child doesn't want to go to school
Before you can help your child, it's important to understand why they don't want to go to school.
Talk to your child openly and honestly about why they don't like school.
Work with them to make a list of what they like and don't like. Lists can help children organise their thoughts, and communicate with you more easily.
Next, talk to your child's school to see if you can find any reasons why they don't want to go.
You can ask:
- Has there been conflict with other pupils or teachers?
- Is your child being bullied?
- Are there classes your child is struggling with?
- Are there particular classes, days or times of the day your child is missing?
- Does the school think your child has special educational needs (SEN)?
- What would the school recommend or are there any changes that could be trialled?
Establish routines
- Show your child that you think going to school is important
- Try to get into a morning routine at home, some people need to prepare mentally for the day ahead, and your child may need more time to get ready before school
- Talk about their morning routine, and how long they need to take a bath or shower, get dressed and have breakfast. Having a regular routine where your child is always focused on the next task can be a good way to motivate them
- Encourage good habits such as going to bed on time, reading before bed, regular bedtimes
- Encourage your child to get everything ready for school the night before
Be open with your child's school
Stay in contact with your child's school, and ask them for support when you encounter problems.
Always let the school know when your child is off school through illness and when they can expect them back.
Explain what you're doing to improve your child's school attendance and ask for their advice.
Emotionally Based School Avoidance
Emotionally Based School Avoidance (EBSA) is a broad term used to describe a group of children and young people who have severe difficulty in attending school due to emotional factors, often resulting in prolonged absences from school.
There are a range of different reasons a child or young person does not want to attend school. The combination of factors differs for each individual and there is no single cause.
EBSA is different from truanting or 'wilful' non-attendance as there is often an underlying presence of anxiety and/or emotional upset and no significant anti-social behaviour.
If you suspect your child is suffering from EBSA, you should talk to your school. They will work with you to support your child. Professionals in mental health and special educational needs may help where needed. The council's educational psychologists can also offer advice to you and the school.
Further information about EBSA
You can find out more in our guide to EBSA for schools.
You may also find the following websites useful: